How Your Behavior Shapes
your relationships


With Valentine’s Day fast approaching, people are finding themselves pondering their relationships, questioning whether finding the one is based on the person or timing, and asking the question of why they are single?

There is no set answer to any of these. It could be due to personal choice. It could be as simple as you’ve not met a person who intrigues you.

Or, it could be how you are being perceived.

That doesn’t mean you don’t want a relationship, it could be more than the vibes you are sending to those around you that you aren’t interested in.

Through subtle facial movements, body language, and tone of voice you may be sending signals to others and keeping them at bay.

Think about when you bought that gourmet coffee recently. Did you make eye contact with those around you? Did you smile? Were you on your phone? Did you stop, sit down and drink it there? Or were you in a rush? Did you meet friends?

At the time you may not have realized it, but just from that singular encounter, an opinion of you was being made.


Even if you aren’t looking for a romantic relationship, relationships are all around us. They are formed from the moment you are born. You built them with your caregivers, siblings, friends.

It is your behaviors that you will find people being drawn to you, or them distancing themselves.

You can learn a lot about how you are perceived just by taking a moment and reviewing your relationships with friends, family, and previous loved ones.

Think about how they act towards you. Are they warm? Approachable? Do they make you sad or angry? How are they able to gain such emotional responses?

Once you start seeing what others do, you can learn and make changes.

How To Be More Approachable

If you are finding yourself struggling to meet new people and instigate conversation when in social settings, you just need to make a few changes to how you are perceived.

Smile More

Although sometimes it can be possible to overdo smiling, the general consensus is that smiling is better and more welcoming than frowning or being impartial. Try putting yourself in situations and surround yourself in places or with people that make you happy. Then you will find yourself naturally smiling more.

Don’t Look At The Floor

People will never be able to read you properly if you are always head down and staring at the ground under your feet. Holding your head up will make you appear more confident, more approachable and will signal that you are open to meeting others.

Make Eye Contact

In order to show that you are interested and engaged, you need to make eye contact. This isn’t a staring contest so you don’t need to look at them all the time, but you do need to meet their eyes and show that you are actively listening to them and that they have your full attention in what they are saying.

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