Why are so Many Young People
eluding committed relationships


Why many young adults are eluding committed relationships

A growing trend of young adults not committing to long-term relationships has started to appear. This trend has led to some people asking why young individuals are not partaking in defined, typical relationships. The answers are numerous, and we’re going to get to the bottom of this unusual social outcome.


We don’t feel alone even when we actually are

One thing that drives young adults into relationships (in a positive sense) is that they feel lonely and want someone to be around them. The only thing is that fewer young adults feel alone in life even if they are not around anyone aside from work or school. The developments in technology have ensured that people can connect in such numerous and profound ways that it’s different to ever feel as though you don’t have anyone in your life. Let’s see how that is possible.


Incessant online communication

The thing about young adults is that they have a whole host of different online communication options available to them through modern apps. If they want to meet someone to talk about music, they have an app for that. If they want to randomly chat or video chat with a person, they can do that online. Even if they want to meet a romantic partner, they can do that too. The incessant online communication and the constant state of connectedness to others make forming typical relationships an afterthought for many.

Boom of casual dating

Another major change that has emerged in terms of interpersonal relationships has been the increase in the number of people that want to experience casual dating. This substratum of online dating has seen many more people getting involved in recent years. A popular casual dating service Iwantu was created for people who want online hookups nearby or even abroad while travelling.

It provides a wide range of local profiles to make searches of one night stands as easy as possible. Users don’t have to spend hours waiting for a compatible partner in bars – using correct search filters brings guarantees a hot night. Such dating sites and apps save people the time and effort of going out to the local watering hole to meet people and rub elbows.

Thus, individuals can get the satisfaction they want without stepping foot into a real building. Although this is highly beneficial, it also detracts from the potential for people to strike up a relationship with somebody that could develop into something more. Since young adults can get exactly what they want without any distractions from the situation, they limit their exposure to other potentially transformative situations in life.

Virtual assistants in any gadget

Another reason that young adults are managing to miss out on committed relationships is by having virtual assistants built into every gadget. Nowadays, it’s a simple matter to do just about anything without interacting with other people. You could plan a trip to another country, make reservations, or order a meal without talking to another person at all.

The element that all these things have in common is they take away the need to have a partner to help someone with all these things. You might want to plan a trip with a romantic partner, but a virtual assistant that does everything for you will be just as beneficial.

The bottom line is that young adults don’t feel alone since they are increasingly getting their fill of conversations and interactions from the virtual world. They don’t feel the need to connect with others and form relationships as a result.

Modern young people don’t feel grown up and adult persons until their thirties

The millennial generation is facing a lot of difficulties. On one hand, they have the very real challenges that came from graduating high school in a recession, being told to go to college only to face a dearth of well-paying jobs, and the struggles of feeling like a real adult. On the other hand, many have been coddled by their parents and life in general. Why the disconnect and how does it impact relationships?


Never-ending education possibilities

A major problem that has emerged for millennials is centered around going off to college. Instead of gearing up for jobs, college programs have become indulgent and bloated, designed to take as much money from cash-strapped millennials as possible. The millennials that did graduate from college often feel as though they are ill-prepared for their positions.

They go into a workforce for which they are not ready to integrate and end up failing, throwing their hands up, and quitting when met with resistance. Without the hallmarks of adulthood, such as getting a good job, it’s hard for them to feel adult enough to get married or be a part of a long-term relationship.

Increased average life expectancy

Millennials are not reaching the heights of management in companies despite being in their mid-thirties. The failure to launch stems from older generations not retiring from the workforce, often working into their late 60s and 70s instead of retiring and enjoying their golden years. Moreover, the increased life expectancy has made some millennials determine that it’s better to wait to shift into adult mode.

Overprotective parents

Not every negative aspect of millennials is their fault, though. Sometimes, it’s the parenting. Helicopter parents were a real reason that millennials grew up to have so much difficulty striking out on their own.

When their parents were the ones making phone calls, helping them with chores, and going to bat for them against teachers, it’s no wonder these young men and women feel gun shy about getting into a serious relationship. Millennials have a perceived lack of life skills along with a real demonstrable lack of them as well. Fortunately, these elements have started to abate as a result of major events in recent times.

Career and hedonism instead of a traditional family

Despite movie after movie driving home the point that family is more important than work, many millennials have opted to pursue a career instead of having a family. They are too worried that they will not have the means to provide for them, so they pour all their time and resources into making a living. Unfortunately, that does not provide much time for people to get involved with starting a family.

Many other people in the younger generations simply do not want a traditional family at all. They prefer to keep their options open and continue to have less strict relationships in the sense that they value hedonism over traditional partnerships. The phrase, “Why buy the cow if you get the milk for free?” comes to mind in this situation. People want a physical relationship but not the serious elements of a partnership.

Fear of responsibilities implied by serious relationships

The last reason that young adults are not getting involved in serious relationships is abject fear. A lot of younger people will get into a relationship with the understanding that they are going to have a good time and then split up before it gets “too serious.” This concept has been bemoaned by critics of the younger generation, calling them “commitment-phobes” that are too afraid to put all their eggs in one basket just in case they are wrong about their choice some time down the line.

Although it is not the fault of dating sites, some millennials simply suffer from too many choices. Having too many options makes people stop and reconsider what they are doing, and that can cause them to take no action out of fear of making the wrong decision instead of doubling down on something good. The never-ending list of choices has paralyzed the young adults of the current times.

The young adults of today are not settling in for committed relationships as they did in the past, and that is alarming to the older generations. While many elements of this issue are in their control, some of them were ingrained in them by entitled parents. The pandemic was a wake-up call for many young adults, but others are still lagging behind.

Stay Gold.

Augusto Palmeri

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